So You've Decided to Start Hunting...with Your Husband.

Twenty years ago I married a hunter.

At the time I was self-professed ‘bambi-lover’ and hunting was a subject I chose to ignore. Well fast-forward to 2015 and I have officially jumped into the deep end of the hunting pool and while the process of getting where I am today is a long story best suited for another post, today I am ready to share what I have learned in the past few months while hunting with my spouse for the first time:

1- You MUST communicate your needs!

Okay, this should be a no-brainer right? Not so! Just because you are married does not make you a communication expert! If you are like my husband and I then odds are that you and your spouse are ‘opposites’ in many areas. It really took my husband knowing that, as a newbie (and slightly ocd person), I NEED a plan actually laid out for me…where are we going? When are we going? How long will we stay out? Where will I be? Where will you be?

Seriously.

Are your eyes are rolling back into your head right about now? Then you are feeling my husbands pain. Well, after a few conversations, I conceded that I was not going to have a full arsenal of planning and information and I needed to really decide what was truly important for ME to know, get that information and then just relax and go with the flow on the remainder! This is important because, as a wife and a new hunter, I want to learn from my spouse but I also want to feel like I have a certain amount of control over my experience (yep, there’s that ocd again). If your spouse knows what you need from him he is likely to deliver and this can save you from a regrettable experience in the field.

2- Do YOUR OWN research

Here’s the deal…if I am going to be a serious hunter I need to read and gather information from sources other than my husband. Not only do I learn a lot, but this really sparks conversation between the two of us. I can’t tell you how often I will read something and then go back to my husband to find out if he does that and why or why not? Does it work? What is his opinion? This is really creating conversation and allowing us to understand one another better. I have to tell you that I am constantly in shock and awe about the amount of information that is rolling around inside my husbands head! Don’t tell him I said that.

Other women hunters are a great source of information and support! I joined an archery league and met some AMAZING women hunters! I pick their brains and ask them questions, but most of all I am in awe of how down-to-earth and supportive the majority of these women are!

3- Hunt for YOU…NOT for your spouse!

If you would have told me 20 years ago that I would be hunting with my husband I would’ve laughed you out of the room! First of all, I am NOT the kind of woman who will do something that I don’t want to do, but even if I were I would never be in the woods ready to harvest an animal if it weren’t my idea and I was not ready. I believe that my volunteer work with the Rocky Mountain Elk Foundation and working for conservation has broadened my view of how hunting has a positive effect in so many areas. By promoting hunting and hunting as the greatest form of conservation I realized that I had come full circle. I now clearly see hunters, and myself, as the saviors of bambi.

I have a deep respect for every animal my husband harvests. I usually shed a few tears, but then I jump right in to help make sure our family utilizes as much of that animal as possible! I take a personal responsibility for that animal, even though I did not take it. So now, as I anticipate my first kill I am certain that things will be much the same but this time I am doing this for me. I am helping to feed our family. I am helping to pass on the hunting tradition and raise kids who believe in and fight for conservation and our hunting heritage!

4- Have FUN!

There is no better place to realize just how insignificant you are than knee deep in the backcountry. So put away the phone, let your hair down and don’t be afraid to get dirty together. My 5 year old loves to fish, make mud pies and play in the dirt especially when we are camping and hunting. We encourage her and we join her!

We are taking her with us on every hunt…and while this may lessen our odds during archery season (kids are noisy) we see it as the opportunity to help her build a relationship with mother-nature. There is so much to be said for stripping away the technology and, as a family, getting back to the basics of playing and entertaining ourselves!

So there you have it!

Not only did I write this to share with all of you, but also as a reminder to myself when those trying times arrive (and they will arrive). I've read that couples that hunt together stay together and while I would like to think that this is a consequence of increased communication and understanding, I can't help but wonder if it has, just a little bit to do with the fact husband and wife both have weapons and know how to use them? Hmmmm......

Now, let's flood the Backcountry Boss Game Gallery with ladies and their trophies this year!!

"Go afield with a good attitude, respect for the wildlife you hunt

and the forests and fields in which you walk.

Immerse yourself in the outdoor experience.

It will cleanse your soul and make you a better person."

- Fred Bear, the father of bowhunting

- Mrs. Backcountry Boss (DeNee)

#huntingwithyourspouse #newhunter #backcountryboss